You’ve decided to find a therapist—congratulations, that’s a big step. But now you’re staring at a list of names and numbers, and suddenly your mind goes blank. You’ve never done this before, so what the heck are you supposed to be saying? Here’s the good news, it’s not your job to run this process. Your role is just to be you. Read more to see what I mean.
What Actually Happens
Most of the time, you won’t even talk to the therapist directly on your first call. You’ll likely reach their voicemail or speak with an office assistant. This takes a lot of pressure off. You’re basically just leaving your information and asking if they’re taking new clients. It’s just a message, you’re obligated to nothing. You might leave messages for a few therapists, it’s okay. Therapists are professionals used to getting these messages. We don’t expect to meet with everyone who reaches out to us.
What to Say
Keep it straightforward. Here’s a simple script that covers everything:
“Hi, my name is [your name], and I’m looking for a therapist. I’m wondering if you’re currently accepting new clients. My number is [your phone number]. Thanks so much.”
That’s it. You don’t need to explain your whole life story or diagnose yourself. You’ll have time to elaborate when you actually speak with the therapist. And fear not, it’s their job to guide that conversation, all you have to do is show up and be as honest as you can.
Information to Have Ready
Before you call, grab a pen and have these details handy:
- Your insurance information (if you’re using it)
- Your availability—general idea of what days/times work for you
- Whether you prefer in-person or video sessions
- And if you don’t have answers to all these questions, you will be able to circle back and provide them.
Questions You Can Ask
If you do speak with someone, here are helpful questions:
- “What’s your availability like?”
- “Do you accept my insurance?”
- “What’s your cancellation policy?”
- “How long are sessions, and how often would we meet?”
- “Do my goals sound like things you can help with?”
Remember This
Therapists are used to these calls. They know you might be nervous. If you’re looking for a therapist to help you with your anxiety, then for sure this could be a stressful call to make. There’s no wrong way to reach out. If you stumble over your words or forget something, it’s completely normal. The hardest part is making the call. After that, the therapist will guide the conversation.
If the first therapist doesn’t call back or isn’t a good fit, that’s okay too. Finding the right therapist sometimes takes a few tries, and that’s part of the process. If you first person isn’t your cup of tea, you don’t get a good vibe, keep going until you find someone. You’re taking care of yourself, and that matters.
I’m Jill Giuliano, LCSW. I’m a therapist who practices in my office in Westfield, New Jersey as well as virtually in New Jersey, Pennsylvania and Indiana. If you’re struggling with anxiety, infertility, depression, relationship issues or other concerns, email me or give me a call and we’ll get you started on your journey to feel better. I’ve been at this for over 20 years, therapy with a trained professional can help.
